had enough

I've had enough of picturesque

what normal folks call snow

I've had enough of solid pipe

where water use to flow




I've had enough of frozen water butts

centimetres thick

that broke the hammer handle

and shattered a concrete brick




I've had enough of icy paths

and wellies with no tread

this cruel world I've had enough

I'm going back to bed

a phone

in my pocket is my phone
But I never touch a key
it has a massive memory
the latest technology
it can tell me where I am
pinpoint accuracy
is it right to use something
twice as smart as me? 

Christmas greetings

No time to go out shopping

in towns covid restricted

the likes of Ebay and Amazon

will make a fortune as predicted




so in the humble croft

with shopping in decline

have to do make and mend

with last years baler twine




the wool caught on the fencing

will wash and turn to felt

to line the side for comfort

of the blue baler twine belt




looking down the present list

that want trivial tat

with some nimble plating

you think you'll make a hat




the electric fence energiser

will use for fairy light

sparking on the tinsel

with flashes blue and white




may you have hand sanitiser

enough loo rolls to last

a hope the stay safe greeting

will soon be in the past

Christmas gifts

I bought my love dagging shears
and an Opinel knife
then I asked would she be
my ever loving wife


She said I was a skinflint
and home truths were told
so can I get dagging shears
in silver or in gold?

Christmas eve

Christmas eve on the croft

life could be so sweet

filling up the rodent boxes

to give the rats a treat




parcelling up the presents

like the professionals do

but using feed sacks and baler twine

and a granny hitch or two




hints dropped for Highland Park

to see in the new years

and you need a torch for the dark

but it's going on deaf ears




hunting for decorations

that no one else will see

due to the restrictions

and good will absentee

festive dinner

Restricted family Christmas

have a dinner low in fat

may I recommenced to you

the humble farmyard rat




the foodies will be ecstatic

they'll have recipes to inspire

of all the tasty festive meals

can be collected from my byre




so bring your guns and traps

to catch rodents at large

and as it's the festive season

this year there'll be no charge

Wot no milk

 

Wot no Milk

It is that time of the year, cold hands, pink teats, and no milk, Why?

It's all to do with the short day length.

In the temperate zones we have long day periods and short day periods corresponding to winter and summer. Light enters the eye and sends a signal to the pituitary gland.

(The pituitary gland is referred to as the “master gland” because it monitors and regulates many bodily functions through the hormones that it produces, including: growth and sexual/reproductive development and function. glands (thyroid gland, adrenal glands, and gonads)

Short days it produces melatonin ( the sleep hormone). In a goat, it tightens the skin, sends less blood to the small capillary vessels near the surface. (Pink teats) The skin tightening, holds the second follicle hair in place (cashmere and Mohair) and creates the shear line in sheep wool. It also tightens the udder making it harder to store milk thus less milk. How much less? A goat that produces 1 gallon or 4.5 to 5 litres in summer will produce 0.5 to 1 litre per day, or a pint to 2 pints in the winter, Luckily this reduction in milk supply only last 4 months. When not producing milk the energy goes into producing fat on the back. This fat is used for the first 12 weeks to supply milk to the new born kid.

Most crofters use the winter for breeding, when milking has to stop 6 weeks before kidding. Ideally if you manage to kid the goat 6 weeks before the equinox, a useful amount of milk can be maintained until the day length catches up. Prior to kidding the goat is flushed with hormones like prolactin that overrides the sleep hormone.

In spring the day lengthens blood flows to the teat, which turns black and expands giving a greater supply of milk. By the longest day, milk production is at its height, and starts to fall back on 20^th July.

Humans also suffer from the short day effect. The skin tightens, cracks and takes ages to heal. No end of cream can speed up the healing process. Skin becomes pale, the body slows down and wants comfort food.

There is a cure for this, spend winter in New Zealand and Summer in the UK.

But who will break the ice on the water buckets, dig through feet of snow to feed the goats best quality hay and concentrates, just to get a squirt of milk in the dark. Some one short of funds that needs a bottle of Highland park for Christmas!